The Ian Report #490 – “Bullets! BULLETS! EXPLOSION! STOP! YOU’RE FALLING!”
Apr 2010 01

Going back and watching some old raw footage, I’m realizing my method of directing basically consisted of screaming out whatever is about to kill the characters. It’s actually pretty rad.

I have a list of 24 things I need to change in the film before the next version is done, and they’re going surprisingly quickly! Just a half dozen or so left and it’s good! I’ve told everyone I’ll have it down by this Wednesday- and I better!

The problem with Peanut Butter & Jelly sandwiches is, as I see it, an issue with physics. There reaches a point where the peanut butter reinforced bread stops being able to support the application of more jelly—sometimes this point comes long before a suitable about of jelly has been added (say… infinite jelly?). It’s basically an issue of surface-to-volume ratios… so I’ve devised a simple solution.

I call it, “Sandwich 2000″. As you can see (above), the surface to volume ratio is MUCH more efficient, and as such, can hold 100 TIMES MORE JELLY (according to preliminary calculations). It still can’t hold the ideal amount of jelly (say… infinite jelly?), but it’s a step in the right direction.

For a better tomorrow!

Ian Hubert
Writer Director

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