The Ian Report #487 – Beta Fish
Mar 2010 11

So the last few days I’ve driven over to the edit suite and watched over the movie, making tweaks and throwing in last minute shots. If all goes according to plan then by the time you read this the film will be as close to picture lock as I can get it. At some point—perhaps even later today?—Phil is going to be making a disc for him and Nathan to look over the movie in its entirety, for final comments.

The ability to conceive of an entirely new shot, and then manufacture it from scratch with only the investment of time, is both a blessing and a curse—which I was going to go into more detail about, until I realized you could really basically infer the pros and cons of that one without me blabbin’ on.

So let me talk about fish. One of my roommates brought his pet beta fish into the home. And then left. I mean technically he still lives here, but none of us have seen him in weeks. Which is fine, but it means taking care of the fish has been put onto our shoulders. We’re all feeding him, which is good, but we’re also feeding him way too much.

As I watch, he’s trying to eat some food, but he can’t find it amidst the soggy layer of filth that coats the surface. I try to scoop it out with a spoon but the surface tension makes it keep sliding off. The only answer is to significantly change his water, but I can’t do that till the water reaches room temperature and distills a bit.

In my view, the total life experience of a fish is, “Sit around and die”.

I understand now why my dad never really wanted pets.

I could probably swing this all around and try to force an analogy at the last minute, but dang if that wouldn’t be a depressing analogy!

Ian Hubert
Writer Director

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